Thoughts on Living a More Effortless Life

The Magic is You

Nov 2

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In this episode of The Magic is You, I explore thoughts around how to live a more effortless life. Separating the truth of who we are from false beliefs, patterns, and identities can go a long way in helping us feel more ease in our day to day life. Why? Because being who we really are is actually the “EASE-iest” thing in the world. I believe that our more effort-LESS life is a result of a process of UNBECOMING what we are not and coming home to who we are.

Transcript

Please note: This transcript is auto-generated, so there may be spelling and grammar mistakes.

Hey, Michelle here with The Magic is You Podcast. And in this episode I want to pose the question of what does it really mean to live an effortless life? And the thought that came to me around this was that whenever I feel like something is a lot of effort and is hard, it is difficult, it's taking a lot of time and energy in a way that does not feel flowy. It feels like you're forcing yourself, pushing yourself in those experiences. Looking back in hindsight, I can see that a lot of the efforting is due to believing something that isn't true.

And it's really difficult to catch yourself in the moment of putting in a lot of effort because everything takes effort. Putting 1ft in front of the other takes effort. So it's not that effort in and of itself is bad. In fact, the word effortless doesn't mean no effort. It means less effort. Effort less. So what I'm talking about is when things take more effort than they need to. And I think that that is due to adding a belief to the situation that isn't necessarily true.

And the inner work in this scenario is being able to stop ourselves with enough self awareness to pause and look at where am I believing something that isn't necessarily true? And it's really hard to locate the belief when it's tied to who we think we are, when it's tied to how we think the world works. This is just how it is. This is reality. You don't even think that it's something to question. You think it's just how things are. And that's a crazy thing about beliefs tied to identity. We literally think that they are part of us. We can't even see it because it's so in our identity.

It's not something like the second you can see it, that means it's starting to separate from your identity. When you can see it, it means that it's no longer this integrated part of you. It's starting to separate from you. And you can point at it. Point at it and say, that isn't me. That's a belief, that's a pattern, that's an identity that I've been carrying, but it's not me. And whenever I feel like something takes a lot more effort than it needs to, it's always because of that. It's always a signal of where to do the inner work, to release what isn't serving me, release what isn't true.

And on the one hand, that can be exhausting because every time you're releasing an identity, it feels like part of you is dying. So depending on how big that part is, it can feel exhausting. But on the other hand, it's just a constant chipping away, little by little, day by day, proving to yourself who you really are and who you're not. And like today, one of the things that I did to come home to who I really am is last night I set myself up to have a really good morning. So there's a space in my bedroom next to the big window with lots of natural light. And last night I set up this space so that there's a table next to the window with a little no, there's a chair next to the window with a little table. I got my exercise mat. I have this thing that I use for my neck.

I put that next to the mat. I have a beautiful book that Amy sent me. I have everything set up for me to do the things that I know my higher self does. And this morning I rolled out my mat, did my neck exercises, my meditation, my mobility exercises. I drank a glass of water, opened the window, let my eyes be exposed to natural light. I sat down, opened up procreate, followed an art tutorial, and then started reading the book from Amy. And sitting in this chair next to the window. And it's morning and it's peaceful.

This should not take any effort. When you hear it, you think, oh, this is really just a nice way to start your day. Why wouldn't you do it that way? And yet if we look at the things that on the surface, it seems like that shouldn't be hard. And yet how many things that we know are good for us. We know that the seven year old version of us would have loved to do that, would have loved to make art, would have loved to start her day putting herself first, would have loved to create that space, that sacred space. And yet there's resistance as adults, things that we would love to do just for fun, love to do just for ourselves, love to do in order to feel better. There's so much resistance. And it's not because the thing itself is hard.

It's because of the beliefs, identities and patterns that we carry around that disconnect us from these things being effortless. And so, in the beginning, it can feel like you're going through the motions of putting yourself first, going through the motions of turning off the computer and going for a walk, going through the motions of sitting down to eat a really nice meal instead of forgetting to eat because you're rushing or eating something without even knowing what you're eating because you're going so fast through your day and you're not taking the time to sit down and have a good experience and a good meal. Like all these little things where we're choosing a survival mode version of reality instead of higher self mode, it almost feels like we're doing the survival mode way because it's less effort to do it. The real self honoring way feels like it's more effort. But the only reason it's so easy to slip into survival mode ways of being is because that mode allows us to hold on to all of these beliefs that aren't true. And to move into higher self mode is to get comfortable with the discomfort and the pain sometimes of letting go of what is not serving you and allowing those patterns to come up and leave your body, allowing those identity shifts and that identity cris to happen over and over and over again. Like, there was a time where I couldn't even imagine starting my day putting myself first. Like the amount of inner work that it has taken to get to this point.

And yet at the same time, it's not like I had to become the kind of person who would put herself first. I used to be that person. I used to have that identity as a child. I don't feel this feeling of, okay, I need to figure out how to be this type of person. I have this feeling of I need to come home to who I was all along. And that's the root of it. Because when you really think about it, being who you really, truly are should be the most effortless thing in the world. It is the most effortless thing in the world to just be who you truly are.

So that's not what makes it hard for people to be who they are. What makes it hard is trying to access the truth of who you are while simultaneously holding on to all the lies, all the beliefs that aren't serving you, all the patterns that you've piled on top in order to cope or survive. And the only way we're going to release all of that is to give ourselves the space to identify, okay, if I really was just being who I truly am, doing what I truly love, putting myself first, honoring myself, what would that person do? How would that person wake up? How would that person start her day? How would that person get dressed? How would that person make a meal and eat a meal? How would that person exist? And to go through the motions of doing those things and allowing yourself to feel like you're dying, even if it takes weeks and months, because that's a good sign. If you feel like something is dying, that's a good sign. Because that is the old belief dying, the old pattern dying, the old identity dying.

So I think this is the essential thing to remember is that we're all kind of programmed to think that we have to become this person that we want to be, and we don't. You don't need to become her. You need to unbecome all the things that you thought you had to be.

And what's left is who you truly are. See, you are already that person. And all that is left to do is to release everything that is not true about you. And you do that by stepping into that version. That not even that version of you stepping into who you truly are, remembering what you loved as a child, remembering what it felt like to just exist and be happy because you existed. To feel that you were worthy just because you existed, to feel that you were enough just because you existed and remember how that person lives and feels, and to go ahead and step into that and allow those feelings of that feeling of an identity crisis to give that a safe space to happen. Don't make it mean anything bad. Make it mean that it is working.

This feels like crap, but thank God this is leaving my body. Like, have enough self awareness to know that this is how it is. This is how it works. This is what it means to let go of what no longer serves you. And bonus points that you are able to do that by doing the things that take care of you. Like book that massage, go take that walk, eat at that really nice restaurant. Like, this is the magic as you philosophy. Amy and I kind of stumbled into figuring this out, where it's like, wow, the best way to do this work is to live as if the magic is you right now.

Not the magic is you after you lose the weight, not the magic is you after you build a successful business, not the magic is you after you. XYZ if we truly believe that the magic is you, then that is now. It's not something we earn or achieve or wait. It's a now thing. And by stepping into that, you start to do those things that you thought you had to wait for or earn or deserve, and you start to do those things now. And through that, all of the healing starts to take place. And it's a beautiful way to create that healing, because you're no longer in this mentality of, okay, I need to suffer, and I need to put in the work and the grind. No pain, no gain.

You shove all of that narrative off the table and you start really, truly, deeply taking care of yourself, honoring yourself, seeing yourself. And that leads to this clarity of seeing how it truly has been inside of you all along. It was never some exterior point that you had to reach. It has always been in you all along. There has never been a moment where you did not possess this power. So that's my ramblings. I think I was starting out with talking about effortlessness. So how do we tie it back to that? To truly live as though the magic is you is to live the most effortless life possible.

Because you are constantly creating a safe space to release the things that are not true about you, that are not serving you, that are not you. And the more you do that, the more you are just the fullness of who you are, the truth of who you are. And there is nothing more effortless than being who you are.