The Biggest Lesson I’ve Learned

Hi! Michelle here.

After just completing one of the biggest money months ever in my biz, I was reflecting yesterday on where I was 5 years ago.

5 years ago wasn't pretty. In fact, it was downright, most definitely, very much not pretty at all.

I was living in dilapidated apartment, sleeping and working on an old futon on the floor. There were roaches, there was mold, there was mis-matched, second-hand donated furniture.

Things were starting to shift for me as my online business grew and in a couple months, I would be in a better place.

However…

I want to be honest with myself about those early days.

The biggest lesson I’ve learned is that I’ve settled for less than I deserved throughout my life and THAT was the real issue.

I was mentally trapped by the idea that I couldn’t truly go off and live my own life until I made sure the friends and family around me were ok.

I kept my own life small in order to continue “sticking around” and “being helpful.”

I look back at many of those “hard” times and if I’m being honest with myself and with you, I didn’t need to go through it.

I didn’t need to take responsibility for other people. I didn’t need to take other people “with me” as I worked to change my life and make it better.

But my self-protection mechanism said, “You’re never going to feel ok unless you make sure the people you care about are ok.”

I only really started making REAL progress when I faced my biggest fear and stepped into the truth of “I can live my own life and let other people be ok or not be ok and I’ll still be ok.”

I stopped being a bandaid and I started being a higher, better expression of myself.

We all have a self-protection pattern and we carry it around as if it’s reality. As if it’s the way the world works.

But it’s not.

It’s just how our traumatized mind works in order to keep us feeling safe.

I had to learn how to feel safe putting myself first.

Not only is it something I’m still learning, it’s something that I realized is meant to be at the HEART of any kind of WORK I do.

If I had known this earlier in my life, I would have avoided the type of work that required me to settle, to put myself last, to make do with less, and I would have FOCUSED on the work of honoring my own desires, my own needs, and my own path.

One of the biggest lies we are taught to believe is that somehow the world is better off when we put ourselves last.

It’s not.

Let’s stop entertaining lies and step into the truth. If 2020 has taught us anything, it’s taught us to call B.S. on the B.S. and start living our lives NOW.

P.S. If you’re curious about what you’re self-protection pattern is, read Mastin Kipp’s book, Claim Your Power.